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"Tine-bending density is what I look for in a torte." --MBV

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Archive for 'social subluxation'

Zombie Bloodworms of the Underworld

In an astonishingly anticlimactic personal victory, I managed to spend three hours at my favorite bar without accepting expensive gifts from drunken strangers, flirting with anybody, getting into any brawls or punching anyone in the face.  I only had three drinks.
I was bored and irritable.
I left early.
Clearly, I was meant for so much more.
The following [...]

Word to Your Chiropractor

When you see me charging toward you and hear me speak clearly and perhaps somewhat loudly the words "EXCUSE ME," that is your cue to get the fuck out of my way.
There was a wall of people.  Somebody was going to have to move to let me pass.  I chose you.  You didn’t budge.
You were [...]