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"Tine-bending density is what I look for in a torte." --MBV

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Mimosas Should Flow Like A River

I ate a shit tonne of caviar at Breakfast Mountain today. I don’t even bother to put it on anything most of the time. I just shovel it into my face.

Hey, if you don’t want people to eat it, don’t put it out there. It’s a buffet. We don’t eat at buffets because we are dainty. We eat at buffets because we are HUNGRY. And we eat at fancy-pants buffets because we like fancy-ass food. Now stop looking at me like that, and make me a waffle.

P.S. Still pissed as hell that none of these $12-$16 brunch buffets have REAL maple syrup. I mean, come on! Fucking pretend maple-flavored corn syrup?! NOT FANCY.

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